If I handed you a magic wand right now and told you it would transform anything you wanted to change about yourself or your life, what would you change?
It might be your appearance. It might be your age. It might be your job, your popularity, the amount of money in your bank account, or the amount of power you have.
In other words, we would want to change the things that we feel bad about. These are our insecurities, and our insecurities are one of the reasons we need God.
Because that magic wand doesn’t exist, let’s talk about insecurity. Here are some things you need to know about it:
Everyone deals with insecurities. If you feel insecure about something in your life, please know that you are not alone. When Karen and I first married, both of us were dealing with significant insecurities and self-esteem issues.
In fact, have you ever been standing in line at the grocery store and wished you looked like a beautiful model on a fashion magazine? People like that are insecure, too. Studies have shown that the group of people with the lowest self-esteem of almost anyone are fashion models.
They are in a brutal industry that exploits people based on their appearance, so they are obsessed with the way they look. They are never satisfied. Many of us are insecure about the way we look, too, but these models—who are blessed with beauty and fitness—are not happy, either.
Security starts with comparison. Fashion models are insecure because they are constantly comparing themselves to each other. There’s always someone prettier. That’s the root of insecurity: constantly comparing yourself to someone or something better. It’s self-torment.
Our insecurities express themselves in different ways. Karen was insecure, and so she went through life with a lot of shyness. People intimidated her. If you made her feel insecure, she would cower.
I was the opposite. The more insecure I felt, the more macho I acted. If you made me feel insecure, I would shove my chest out at you and stare you down.
The only true source of security is God. Psalm 91 says, “He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, ‘Heis my refuge and my fortress; My God, in Him I will trust.'”
The psalmist is saying that if we dwell in the secret place of God, we will live under His protection and security. When we are fearful or have problems, we turn to whatever makes us feel secure. Things or people might offer false security, but they will fail us. Only God offers true security.
- Will we trust in money for our security or will we trust in God?
- Will we trust in possessions for our security or will we trust in God?
- Will we trust in our job for our security or will we trust in God?
- Will we trust in our looks for our security or will we trust in God?
- Will we trust in people for our security or will we trust in God?
We all have insecurities. The first and most important step in changing your insecurity is to trust in God. Make Him your refuge.
You’ll either live your life with insecurity, with false security, or with the true security that comes from a personal relationship with God. Which will you choose?
Jimmy Evans // Marriage Today