Last week, we talked about finding the purpose for your marriage. God’s overall purpose for your marriage is relationship. You were created to pursue Him and enjoy a relationship with each other. Through marriage, He helps form us into the people He created us to be.
That’s the big picture. But God is also interested in the details of our lives, and that means He also has a more specific purpose for your marriage. How do you discover what that purpose is? It’s simple: You ask Him. Together, ask “God, why did you put us together?” Then listen for the answer.
I advise couples to seek this answer on an annual Vision Retreat. Get away from your kids or responsibilities, get alone with each other, and seek God. Pray. Talk. Be vulnerable and transparent with each other. Sit in God’s presence until you hear His voice. (We offer an online app to walk you through this at visionretreatjourney.com.)
But you may still be wondering why vision is so important for a marriage. Here are five specific reasons:
Clarity. It’s impossible to succeed if you don’t know what you’re trying to accomplish. God never creates anything to operate in confusion, so He will shine light on our confusion to give us clarity. He will help us understand why He put us together.
Passion. If you don’t know the vision for your life and marriage, then it’s impossible to get excited about it. But once you identify this purpose, you can pursue it with energy and passion. You’ll wake up every morning excited to pursue your purpose.
Purity. Have you ever heard the phrase “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop”? Without a purpose, people cast off restraint and fall into sin. But with a shared vision, you’ll live your life pursuing something concrete. That keeps you from being as vulnerable to negative influences or temptations.
Unity. Couples fight when they don’t see eye-to-eye. The word division even refers to this. It comes from a root word that means “competing vision.” Two can’t walk together unless they’re in agreement, and a husband and wife who are divided will not see success in their marriage. Instead of division, you need a single vision.
Victory. Have you ever run a race where you didn’t know where the finish line was? Probably not. If you don’t know which direction to head, how will you ever finish? Victory is only possible when a specific goal is in sight.
All of these virtues can result from seeking and discovering God’s vision for your marriage. As you bond together in a Vision Retreat, you will find your relationship being healed. You’ll begin moving in the same direction. You’ll find clarity, purity, and passion. Ultimately, you’ll discover victory.
If you haven’t planned one this year or ever, I suggest taking a Vision Retreat with your spouse. I’ve seen it transform marriages forever.
Jimmy Evans // Marriage Today